gold house

by Chelsey Weber-Smith

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In progress


released June 27, 2015



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Chelsey Weber-Smith Seattle, Washington

suburban sad sack outlaw country

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Track Name: new humans
Muses come again to me leaving the gold house,
do your cool thoughts and wanton heart still weigh upon your brow?
I felt it too on the hill of the Muse, staring at the Aegean Sea
What worries you, my tenth dark muse, well it worries me.

Phaedo laid his perfect head on the lap of Socrates.
He loved him then at the trials end, and cried into his knees.
Old Socrates would drink the tea, twists Phaedo's golden curls
The last words he said was to fix a debt and died quiet for the world.

Oh, what love.

Lorca raised his heavy head to stare into the trees.
He didn't know how but he held dark sound in his small body.
The killed him then, they shot him dead, scared of that true beauty.
More powerful than the cry of the war was a love like lightning.

In a dream Johnny saw a picture of the new humans
they were beautiful, blue-skinned, and bright, soft, and genderless.
When they spoke, not through their throat, but through their golden eyes
The whole of the world was a golden curl sheered from lamb of sky.

Oh, what love.

When the pastor says God
I just replace it with Love
Rilke said it comes at the end.
Don't wait for a savior
all of us will add up to one
we are what makes it come.

When I meditate your body enters mine
I am blue and so are you and we lie in the yellow light
It is more than love, a step above, we are crosses on the sun
you are more than you in electric blue, the shine of the chosen one.

Oh, we are love.
Track Name: suburbs
I grew up in a suburb far away from here.
In love with love, but more afraid of fear.
But there’s a quiet place that I find everywhere.
The world didn’t end, my friends, we are still here.

And I dreamed a dream,
we were children again.
No parents, we left them
to meet in a field with the night slowly coming in.

I’m trying to take care of all the people I love.
I’m trying to take care of even those I have lost.
But there’s a secret place where everything is as it was.
It’s a field in the night you can find if you’re quiet enough.

And I seen a scene,
where the ocean meets the cliffs.
We’ve been there, and we’ll be there
for the rest of our lives, held inside of it.

Every time I dream I dream of you.
Every time I dream I dream of you.
Every time I dream well the sky falls down on me
and I wonder if you dream of me.
If you still see the same thing I see.

When I really see well I see you.
When I really see well I see you.
When I really see well the sky lays down with me
and I wonder if you still see me.
If you still dream the same thing I dream.
Track Name: colors
Tell me about the blue
how it wounded you
right underneath your eye
like a bee sting
in the summer time
your father carried you away from the hive
under his arm
while you cried

And no I don’t think red looks good on you
you tried your anger on
but it always fit a little loose
oh child of the sky
if the blue it hurts too bad
then look for the green
and see it roll across the land

And tell me about the gold
how it made you old
it was just the setting sun
nut you were young enough
to believe in truth
a girl she stood very close to you
her clothes in her arms
too shy to move

And no I don’t see the turning of the leaves
I tried everything
I don’t know what you want from me
oh child of the sun
if the gold it cuts too deep
remember the good white moon
hanging over your black sleep

Hands up
catch what falls
I saw you cry full rosaries
and then you stopped

Tell me about the rose
how you watched it close
you tacked it on your wall
it dried out nice
it dried out small
you swore that you heard
somebody call
out your name
from down the hall
Track Name: Ramblin' man
I was born a rambling man
born right onto a road
with no idea where it goes
knife at my hip, and smoke in my hands

But what they saw was a little princess
blue eyes and blonde curls
fair as any girl
but they don’t know how red my skin gets
or how red

when I’m out in the sun
in the back of a truck
and I believe in love
even when it treats me real rough

the sun knows all my secrets
even when it goes down
the moon hangs around
and I beg him but he just can’t keep them

So here I stand in the broad light of day
even thing I’ve become
goes soft in the sun
and I could cry at any stranger’s face

cause I’m gone in my heart
the passenger seat of a car
a old man with white scars
is telling me everything he’s loved

I know who I am
but I don’t know if I can
make life from the land
with just my two hands
But oh, I will try
and Lord by and by
all that is real
strands at the edge of the field
I loved you most
when you were a ghost
but now that you’re here
I only feel fear

I was born staring up at the black
born dirty and tired
by an dying campfire
all superstition with no trust in fact
Track Name: sunburn
I know where you have been
you're like a bird flying against the wind
you're like a fish, always swimming upstream
no guarantees there's no guarantee that you'll be redeemed

cause I know what you have done
you're like something green growing toward the sun
you're like the moon, you keep all our light
you don't mind guiding a few fools through the night

cause we get lost and we get found
learn to swim but hope to drown
and I'll pray for your lonely soul
and I'll pray for my own

So here is the new and wild world
we gotta figure out what it's worth
it's like we're all caught up in a blackberry vine
eating sweets and bleeding it seems all of the time

but I try not to be hurt by my love
I watch my skin burned by the sun
it's like sometimes I get too close to the heart
of the world my skin curls apart like madrone bark

I get dead, then I get alive
cross my heart and hope to die
and I'll pray for your sleeping soul
and I'll pray for my own

I pray for you in this bright blue swimming pool
I'm something old that wants to be new

I know it's true when I look up at the moon
it is something old that wants to be new

I wonder too how your eyes. they got so blue
are you something old that wants to be new?

Are you something old that wants to be new?
I am something old that wants to be new,
so I pray for you in this bright blue swimming pool.
Track Name: chemtrails (goodbye)
The planes, they leave chemtrails in the bright blue sky
like white scratches on my arms in the summer time.
I love this world so much sometimes it makes me want to cry
when I'm standing in the dust and waiting for a ride.

I spent a long time with my heart good and broke
when you've got a heart like that it's like a shard in your throat,
when everything that you love is like the side of the road
and you've got a pickup truck inside your gut and that thing just goes and goes.

So I moved out to Virginia and I got a degree
and now I am licensed to write the truest poetry
but the one thing that I learned and I learned begrudgingly
is that the only poems are these kind of moments when the words escape me.

And I go home sometimes remembering your eyes
and I know that I cannot look at them long
because they break my weary heart.

So I guess I'm going home to the other, stranger coast
where I learned how to fish in my father's silver boat
where I learned what to keep and what to let go
now it all slips between my fingertips, I watch it sinking like a stone.

So I'm sorry my friends for all the weird things I've done,
when I act like the dark and when I act like the sun.
I want you all to know I never forget your love,
it is stuck under my heart like bright pink bubble gum.

And I go home sometimes dreaming of new skies
and I know that I cannot look at them long
because they break my weary heart

because I hate saying goodbye
because I'm always saying goodbye,
It's like everything I know gets behind me on the road
and I could kiss you tonight

while the planes, they leave chemtrails in the bright blue sky
like white scratches on my arm in the summertime.
I love this world so much sometimes I think I'm gonna die
when you're standing in the dust and waving goodbye.
Track Name: happy birthday to me (and the world as I know it)
Happy birthday now to me
happy birthday to this old dog
all I want for my birthday is to feel that old sense of awe

The world it turns
And so do I
I did it, I hit it, then the world turned it other cheek and I kissed it

I saw a boy crucified in the sky
he looked down with the stars in his eyes
I asked him what if anything he’d want
he said all I want is for you to come up

He said the world it hurts
And so do I
I wouldn’t, I knew I shouldn’t, the world’s my little darling and I just couldn’t

Where I always go now I return
the light across the water that’s all I’ve learned
I don’t know whether to be silent or shout
I want to scream at you and hold your hand throughout

In the world, I know you learn, you learn
And so do I
But the quiet and riot both have their songs to sing
And so do you

So what kind of song will we sing to bring the world down to its knees?
And what kind of song will we sing to bring the world up to its feet?

To all my friends I love who have said goodbye
you’re welcome back into my life anytime
and if you just can’t that’s okay by me
you visit me anyway inside my dreams

I know the world, it turns
And so do we
But I keep fighting, I got two lions inside me and a scorpion and a dragon